So close...yet so far

Yes, that is my "breast" friend <----- that was a lame joke..I know!

I have been exclusively pumping now for 10 solid months. I set a goal to give Harper breastmilk for 12 months. I'm almost to the finish line, I can feel it. But, I'm not close enough. I'm literally counting down the months/days/weeks/hours/minutes/seconds.

I'm so over pumping. I only do it now because I know it's best for Harper and our family. I don't judge anyone who decides breast feeding/pumping doesn't work for them, it just worked for us.

I gave myself no option but to give Harper breastmilk. I just thought I would be nursing, not pumping. After Harper was born 5 weeks early, I knew giving her breast milk would be the best thing I could do for at that time. But if I'm completely honest, I know it was best on our wallets too. I knew I had 9 weeks of no paycheck, a babysitter to pay and diapers and wipes to buy. I felt I was left with no other option. It was what worked best for us.

I had a tremendous support system. My husband, mom and friends were my biggest cheerleaders. If I didn't have their support, Harper would be a formula baby. (Which again, I don't judge and don't have a problem with...just sayin).  Between Harper being a preemie and having jaundice, breast feeding just didn't work. Enter my "breast" friend.

We have travelled a tough road Patty the Pump. You have been with me for EVERY.SINGLE. feeding. Anywhere I go, you go too. We are BFF's.....but I can't wait to break up. It's me, not you. You haven't done a thing wrong. As a matter of fact, you have done everything perfectly...which is why this break up is so hard to do. Just know, you will have given me a good year.

So with that being said....TWO.MORE.MONTHS!

(maybe less actually! I have a deep freezer that is somewhat full, so I'm thinking I may give up pumping within the next month and give her my freezer stash until it runs out).

It's so funny though. I talk this big talk about how I can't wait to give up pumping, but honestly, I get a little anxious and nervous when I think about not pumping anymore. Maybe it's because a piece of Harper's "babyhood" is leaving and I'm not ready to give it up. I don't know...I guess it will be a bittersweet time for me.

With that being said, I can't wait to have my body to myself before the next baby. Because I know it's rinse and repeat when I have Baby Cutlip v.2.

And the worst mommy of the year award goes too...

This Mommy!

 So I can't remember if I mentioned it or not, but Harper has been sort of under the weather since LAST WEDNESDAY! We thought it was just teething or allergies. She didn't seem miserable AT ALL. Just snotty and a cough here and there. Last Wednesday night she woke up in the middle of the night screaming. We thought she was just having a nightmare or her snotty nose was getting the best of her. We finally got her calmed down and she went back to sleep and slept for a long time. She woke up and acted like normal Harper with a little extra snot. We went to WV and she was fine. Played, chit chatted, etc. We could tell she was a little "off" but we again thought it was just teething. Nothing out of the ordinary.

On Tuesday I picked her up from Mrs. Alexis' and she seemed extra grumpy and feverish. The first time she has shown signs of a fever. Alexis told me she didn't get a good nap because they had a lot to do that day. So I figured she was grumpy because she was so tired. I gave her Tylenol and to bring the fever down and she went to bed just fine. She woke up on Wednesday and I could just tell she was not feeling well. So I stayed home with her for a few extra hours to let her sleep in and relax. When she woke up she was playing, giggling and chatting. I thought she seemed normal but still a touch of a fever. I took her to Mrs. Alexis thinking she would be okay. By 3:00 I got a phone call saying she is just not acting herself. So I immediately called the doctor and got an appointment at 4:00.

Baby girl has her first ear infection! :(

We went 10 months without any antibiotics, which is pretty good. But I'm still sad she is sick. I'm even more sad I didn't realize she was THAT SICK! And the stupid nurse practioner made me feel even worse for not bringing her in earlier. I'm pretty sure the office manager will be hearing from me today because I'm still upset about it.

So last night after the appointment and filling the prescription we headed home to eat dinner and cuddle. She ate just fine and cuddled with me and slept for a bit. I pumped her full of antibiotics and Tylenol. Here is a picture of her eating dinner...does this look like a sick baby?!

No..it doesn't....still cute and happy as ever. She slept through the night last night, but woke up at 5:30 and wasn't a happy camper. But at least she is home with her Daddy and has a 5 day weekend to fully recover.

Sorry for the long post...but I'm still upset I didn't realize my daughter was sick. Major Mommy Fail! 

Weekend Recap

This post is going to be boring... I will warn you now.

Consider yourself warned...

Let me start by saying, I have "misplaced" my camera cord, so that means no pictures today or until I find it or buy a new cord.

Second, I'm sorry for being such a slacker in the blog department. The camera cord had me a bit annoyed and not motivate to blog and work went into overdrive. It's that time of year again...election time!

Anyway, back to the weekend recap.

Story of the Cutlip life---Will had military duty this weekend. I left work around 1:15 on Friday and headed home to load the car and head to West Virginia. I ended up working from the car the entire way home. Boo! But at least I didn't have to use my vacation time...I got to work and be with my family. So I had the best of both worlds.

I should have mentioned that Harper has been sort of under the weather this past week. It started on Wednesday. I had to work pretty late last Wednesday, so I had a sorority sister who lives close by pick Harper up from the babysitter. Nicole mentioned Harper wasn't a happy camper at all. Which is weird. When Will finally got to her she was a little fussy, but otherwise fine. She ended up vomiting that evening. Then she woke up with a super runny nose and a little cough. And of course, not sleeping well at all. So I'm not sure if it's teething or a legit cold. Only time will tell.

So on Saturday, I let Harper sleep in. She was in an okay mood, but still not herself. We didn't do much. Grammy, Grandy, Harper and I went to the mall to try to get my hair cut off, but no one could squeeze me in. Grandy was excited to push Harper around in her stroller and share is banana pudding milk shake with her. They both had a blast.

That evening we went to Will's dad's house. We visited with family and headed home to put Harper to bed since she was feeling feverish.

After she went down, Will and I headed to our first movie in over a year. It was nice to go, but we were exhausted.

Sunday, Harper, Trooper and I visited my grandmother for a couple of hours before we had to pick up Will. We had a nice visit.

We finally made it home around 10:15 pm. We had to unload and clean out the car, get Harper ready and back to bed, wash bottles, re-pack the diaper bag, get food ready for the babysitter, lay out Harper's clothes for the morning and pump (ugh!). But we split up our duties and were laying in bed by 11:00pm.

Monday morning came quick. It's rainy too. Harper was excited to see Miss Alexis and I'm excited to get home and relax.

The blog post where I can't help but brag!

So, I'm assuming that most of my blog viewers are friends with me on Facebook. And if you are, then you obviously have seen Harper's newest pictures. But I just need to brag on here.

Aren't her eyes just beautiful?!

All of these were taken on the quilt from her bedroom

Showing off her teeth...all 4.5 of them. Remember...she has a super tooth (two fused together)

Harper being Harper

 So I bought this high chair off Craigslist and spray painted it. Is that not the most adorable face you have ever seen!? I mean seriously!?

Laughing at her Daddy in the backgroung

                                                               
                                                               Full shot of the high chair

                                                      Miss Priss working it for the camera

Work it girl....

 

                                              Full shot of her pettiskirt...and those blue eyes!

                                                                          Adorable

                                                                    I love her so much!

This picture is just so Harper. She is giggling and dressed up like a girly girl. AND she has her foot propped up. She props her feet on anything and everything ALL.THE.TIME! And she did it during the photo shoot!

I personally think these pictures turned out amazing. And I was lucky, it was 9:30 am in our backyard. I wasn't sure if Harper would be willing to ham it up for the camera that early..boy was I wrong. She was amazing. My co-worker took these pictures for me. He is so talented and thoughtful to do these for me. I don't think I could have asked for better pictures.

Don't get me wrong, I don't think I have ever seen a cuter kid, but I'm her mom, I'm supposed to think like that. But I'm pretty sure other people think that too. Saturday late afternoon we went to a baby boutique to pick up Harper's "big girl" car seat. When we walked in, everyone went crazy over her. They kept telling us how cute she was. Duh, of course we already know this! :)  The owner of the boutique told us we needed to get her on a cover of magazine ASAP. She even gave us information on who to contact to get her on a cover. Apparently, a vendor (Angel Dear) that works with her is looking for a new baby model.

Even the people I work with are commenting on how beautiful she is. I don't think someone will say it if they don't mean it. So I'm starting to believe I have the next Heidi Klum on my hands. Harper sees a camera and she just lights up! She smiles and giggles until someone snaps the picture. Evidence is above! :)

Okay, I have bragged enough...that little girl is my heart and soul. And I'm so blessed to be her mommy.

And if anyone in my area is looking to have their pictures done, let me know and I will hook you up with my co-worker.

Happy Monday!



Happy Birthday!

I'm a day early in wishing the love of my life a Happy Birthday. I figure tomorrow we will be busy celebrating 31 years of William Lewis Cutlip!

Will, I'm so glad I can help you celebrate your birthday. Even more, I'm so glad Harper is here to help you celebrate. You are one amazing Daddy and husband. We are so lucky to have you in our lives.

This past year has been rough (ie-all my issues related to pregnancy, recovery and motherhood) and you have put up with alot. I owe you the world for your unlimited amount of patience, understanding and love. So tomorrow, I declare "all about Will day". I love you to the moon and back. Happy Birthday Thrill! ;)

We have a very fun weekend planned to celebrate. We are heading to an outdoor concert this evening after I get off work. We are excited because it's absolutely beautiful weather here today AND it's BYOB! I guess Harper will have to be our DD (I'm joking!).

But the real funs starts on Saturday...Will's birthday. We are having Harper's pictures taken early in the morning then heading to Great Falls to hike and have a picnic and just generally be together and enjoy the weather.

Sunday, I get to celebrate my very FIRST Mother's Day. I can't believe it. Last year at this time I was puking my brains out because nothing I ate agreed with Harper. Today, I'm counting my blessings and wishing I was pregnant again because she is growing up entirely too fast. I'm extremely blessed. Will and I go to bed every.single.night and tell each other just how much we love Harper and how awesome she is. She has the best little personality. Anyway, back to Mother's Day. Unfortunately, Will has to work on Sunday. But I won't be alone, Aunt Maggie and Aunt K.Hart are coming over for a visit. K.Hart is in town and wanted to visit, so Maggie decided she will drive down from Baltimore to visit us. I can't wait for some girl time. I know Harper will love seeing her Aunties again.

So, we have a fun weekend planned! But most importantly, this weekend is going to be all about Will. He deserves it!

Happy Friday!

Ewwww!!!

Harper had a first yesterday. It wasn't a pleasant "first" that is for sure.

Let me start by saying, Monday night Harper had prunes and oatmeal for dinner. Her favorite! As I was feeding it to her, I told her I should have waited until Wednesday night so Daddy would have a treat on Thursday. I knew I should have gone with my gut on this one!

When I happily arrived to the babysitter's house yesterday evening to pick up Miss Priss, she was in different clothes. I immediately suspected the worst-she blew out of her diaper. I giggled and asked Miss Alexis if what I had suspected is true. She laughed and said, "oh yeah!" I knew their had to be more the story.

Apparently, Harper was taking a nap and Alexis went up to check on her because it had been awhile. When she walked in she said she has never seen such a sight! This coming from a lady with 4 kids! I guess Harper decided to wake up from her nap and play a little bit before wanting to get up. Harper had blown out of her diaper and/or reached in her diaper and painted the pack-n-play with her poo!! It was in her hands, hair and all over her body. Alexis had to strip Harper and the bed down. It was so bad that Alexis refused to give me Harper's clothes back until she washed them.

I can't say I'm sad for missing that "first" of Harper's! I'm sure it will happen again, but ewwww!

Here are a couple of pictures that I snapped last night. She is getting so busy. She wants to explore anything and everything. I love it!

I turned my back for 2 minutes and she had crawled to the table and started pulling out all of the magazines. I caught her red handed.

She much prefers to stand these days-even to play!

Taking a couple of steps with the assistance of her toy...we have a long way to go before she walks, but she gets the idea.